{"id":133,"date":"2020-10-22T05:36:03","date_gmt":"2020-10-22T05:36:03","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/stories.mysecretdrawer.co\/2020\/10\/22\/why-does-angry-sex-feel-so-good\/"},"modified":"2020-10-22T05:36:03","modified_gmt":"2020-10-22T05:36:03","slug":"why-does-angry-sex-feel-so-good","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/espressoblues.com\/stories\/why-does-angry-sex-feel-so-good\/","title":{"rendered":"Why does angry sex feel so good?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

If you\u2019re married, living together, or have been dating long enough, chances are you\u2019ve had arguments where you felt on the verge of exploding. You know the kind. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

You\u2019re absolutely convinced you\u2019re right, but the other person insists on being a jackass about it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Words are said, doors are slammed, and there might even be a few dishes broken on the kitchen floor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Fuming mad, you confront your partner. You are so overcome with emotion you are almost on fire. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

But then you stop mid-fight because you realize that \u2013 well – you\u2019re extremely turned on.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Chances
Chances are, you and your partner have had arguments that made you feel on the verge of exploding.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Why do you get turned on during a heated argument?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Of course, a verbal knife-fight doesn\u2019t always prompt wild, sinfully delicious sex. Sometimes, you\u2019d both rather that the other just take-off than take off items of clothing. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Other times, however, a heated argument can ignite intense sexual passions, too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Why does this happen? Why does angry, almost obscene make-up sex feel so good, so right? Is there some kinky, deranged, anger fetish going on there?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Unlike a good roll in the hay, emotions aren\u2019t that simple. We are all a complex, often self-contradictory jumble of evolutionary instincts, urges, and egos. But there is method to the madness. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Below are four reasons why some couples sometimes have the best sex when they\u2019re angry.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1. Arguments with your partner can create a strong need for intimacy.<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

While it might seem insane that you and your partner can go from screaming at each other to wanting screaming orgasms, anger and lust are actually linked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The results of a 2010 study<\/a> show that anger often induces a motivation for intimacy, making you want to get closer to the object of your anger.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That\u2019s because lust and anger trigger the release of the same powerhouse hormones: testosterone, adrenalin, and cortisol \u2013 the so-called stress hormone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhen cortisol is released from stress, our bodies and minds may yearn for the closeness that sex provides,\u201d says certified sexologist Jenni Skyler, who is also a relationship therapist at the Intimacy Institute in New York.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"
The results of a 2010 study show that anger often induces a motivation for intimacy.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

2. Sex is a survival response during moments of anxiety.<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

When you have an intense, angry fight with your partner, you unlock a primal, ancient part of your psyche. Your heart beats faster, your cheeks flush, and you start breathing heavily. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Does that sound familiar to you in any other situation? What else gets you all hot and bothered?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That thunderous, fear-like urgency you feel is something evolution provided so that your ancestors might conquer the lion waiting outside the cave.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Fear creates a sense of abandonment, inadequacy, or both. In certain situations, sex can deliver a reprieve by increasing a sense of safety, says Andrew Aaron, a relationship therapist who runs a practice in New Bedford, Massachusetts.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cSex after a fight not only provides relief, it also creates excitement, says Aaron. \u201cYou go from being threatened to feeling triumphant in overcoming the threat by surviving.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"In
In certain tense situations, sex can deliver a reprieve by increasing a sense of safety.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

3. Lust and anger trigger the same need for a physical resolution.<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Yes, the link between anxiety and arousal – lust and anger – triggers the same response from the sympathetic nervous system. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Given the rush of excitement and your proximity to a loved one, anger might easily tumble over into sexual arousal, say experts.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThis also sparks your fight or flight response, which fills you full of energy and makes you motivated to want to physically act in some way,\u201d physiology expert Elesa Zehndorfer tells Cosmopolitan.<\/em>  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

In other words, your body is primed and roaring for physical action. Given his or her proximity, is there a better candidate than your partner, who is ticking you off?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"The
The link between anxiety and arousal triggers the same response from the sympathetic nervous system.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

4. Angry sex is freer and less inhibited.  <\/h3>\n\n\n\n

There is a rational basis to the notion that love can \u201churt so good.\u201d That is, the intense emotions and adrenalin that fuel anger also make it easier for both of you to step out of your comfort zones during sex.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cAngry sex permits for the crossing of boundaries, or having different sex than you\u2019re used to,\u201d says psychologist Janet Brito, a therapist with the Center for Sexual and Reproductive Health in Honolulu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In other words, what makes angry sex so wonderfully animalistic<\/a> is that it is less about romance and more about acting on your desires and urges.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In many cases, angry sex is a departure from the norm. That can be quite exhilarating if you are used to playing things safe in the bedroom.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Angry
Angry sex is less about romance and more about acting on your desires and urges.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Why Angry Sex can be Good for Your Relationship<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

There are many reasons why angry makeup sex is often the best. Makeup sex clears the slate, brings you closer together, and makes you realize where you might improve your relationship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sex can diffuse the tension, allowing you a way – an enjoyable one at that – to step back from the situation. The angry, raw passion it injects into the situation can become quite magical, as well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sex also causes a surge of oxytocin, dopamine, and serotonin in your brain \u2013 all of which are \u201chappy hormones.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

There\u2019s scientific evidence linking oxytocin to improved psychological stability. This is a must if you and your partner want to work things out rationally.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That said, is anybody up for a fight?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What’s your story? Do you agree that angry sex can be great… even the best? Why not share your thoughts by reviewing this article below?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

You are so mad you feel like exploding. But then you stop mid-fight because \u2013 well – you\u2019re extremely turned on. What makes angry sex so sinfully delicious?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":134,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_angie_page":false,"page_builder":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[17,43,20],"tags":[175,24,72,97,142],"class_list":["post-133","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-couples","category-lifestyle","category-seduction","tag-angry-sex","tag-couples","tag-relationships","tag-rough-sex","tag-sexual-chemistry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/espressoblues.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/133","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/espressoblues.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/espressoblues.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/espressoblues.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/espressoblues.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=133"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/espressoblues.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/133\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/espressoblues.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/134"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/espressoblues.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=133"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/espressoblues.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=133"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/espressoblues.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=133"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}